For many of us, the act of sex is just as important as eating food. And yet, while we constantly seek out new and varied culinary experiences, we tend to stick to the basics when it comes to sexual intercourse. This is a mistake that you should definitely rectify.
Here are ten obscure sex terms you’ve probably never heard of (and what they actually mean.) Who knows? You might just find that essential secret ingredient that's been missing from your sex life. Bon appetit!
No, it’s not hanging out the laundry. Pegging is the latest sex act gaining ground thanks to shows like Broad City and movies like Deadpool. It involves a straight man being penetrated by a woman wearing a strap-on in order to stimulate his sensitive anal area and P-spot (the prostate – that excellent little gland that offers mind-blowing orgasms).
Misguided beliefs about what this practice might mean for your sexuality has kept this enjoyable experience out of the mainstream for too long. However, it’s actually been around for centuries – sexual libertine, Marquis de Sade, described the act in his literature back in 1795! (Though, he may not have called it pegging back then.)
Strap-ons come in all different sizes and styles these days, with many designed to pleasure both partners simultaneously, making pegging a great experience for couples. Want to give it a try? Check out this Beginners Pegging Kit from LoveHoney!
Dear Lovehacker, My boyfriend and I are trying to be more sexually adventurous and he suggested trying "pegging". Should I be worried about him being secretly gay? Thanks, Peggy.
The term choad, also spelt chode, has been around for years, but that doesn’t mean you’d know what it means – it’s not exactly something you learn in class. The word choad usually means a penis, wider than it is long, and is often used as a derogatory term or insult. In other cases, it can mean the the perineum.
So, if you hear someone asking you to lick their choad, we’d say make a judgment call on that one.
Now Cuckold is a word you might remember from school. If you studied Shakespeare, it’s something you would have heard a lot of his characters either worrying about becoming, or being called as an insult. You may have also encountered the abbreviation "cuck", which has become a popular insult among extreme right-wing and men's rights activists. But what does the word actually mean?
It refers to a man whose wife has been adulterous, often with the man being oblivious. Cue a lot of jealousy, ego and anger. Sounds pretty unsexy, right? But in recent years the term actually refers to a type of sexual play. Cuckoldry is type of fetish whereby a ‘cuckold’ is complicit in their partner’s infidelity. This often plays out as a male taking a submissive role and gaining sexual satisfaction from their active humiliation. A quick trip to your favourite porn site will show you exactly what we mean.
Dear Lovehacker, Let me preface this by saying I am not an attractive man. And I mean that in all senses. I'm fat, ugly, self-loathing, milquetoast, and have absolutely no confidence. I'm in my mid 30s and have long ago (mostly) made peace with the fact that I will never have a fulfilling love or sex life.
So anyway I met "L" a few years ago and we became close friends. Smart, funny, sweet, kind and beautiful. She also has a fiancé, "J", who's a pretty great guy and I regularly hang out with both of them. (You can see where this is going, right?)
Edging is a sexual technique that aims to increase the duration one is able to have sex for. It involves direct sexual stimulation for consecutive, increasing periods of time without orgasming. One ‘edges’ closer and closer to orgasm without allowing release. Increasing this orgasmic control helps improve stamina, performance and makes for an explosive orgasm when you’re ready to let go.
It’s not a practice you need to do alone: legendary sexpert Tracey Cox, has a range of products aptly named ‘EDGE’, aimed at helping improve men’s performance and making them last longer.
A magical horse-like creature with a spiraling horn on its forehead, right? Right. But that’s not the kind you want to have sex with. That kind of unicorn is very different. Colloquially, a ‘unicorn’: refers to a beautiful bisexual woman an existing couple want to include in their sex life.
This beautiful, sexual, single woman will ideally be involved with both partners equally, share in their life, not take on any additional partners, not threaten or disrupt the existing couple in any way and look for nothing in return. Sounds pretty magical right?
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy? No. That’s not the sex-related term we’re talking about. We’re talking about cock and ball torture. CBT involves applying pain to a male’s genitalia. This can include things such as squeezing, ball-stretching, flogging, urethral play, tickling, electro-stimulation and anything else you could think of. It’s a faction of BDSM play that can offer a partner new, intense physical and emotional experiences. With any kind of BDSM activity, the most important thing to remember is that it should all be safe, sane and consensual. CBT is not something you want want to go into willy-nilly. Ahem.
Here are a range of LoveHoney CBT products to get the ball rolling!
Most people's sex lives could be charitably described as "vanilla" - which is totally fine! But if you clicked on this story, I'm going to assume you're flirting with the idea of introducing something spicier.
The world of BDSM isn't just for leather festishists and 50 Shades fans. anybody can get involved - and they totally should. Here's everything you need to know about getting acquainted with the kinkier side of carnal pleasure.
Ladies, get your cloaks and crowns, we’re going queening. And by that, I mean facesitting. That’s right, queening is a synonym for facesitting, which is in turn a synonym for a kind of oral sex whereby the woman, as you might have deduced, sits on her partner’s face. It’s great because it leaves the partner’s hands free to stimulate other areas and puts the woman largely in control. In a similar vein, it’s often used in part of BDSM in a Dominant/submissive way.
Jelqing is the fairly unsafe and unsubstantiated practice of trying to naturally enlarge one’s penis with a specific stroking massage. A man will squeeze and stroke his penis in such a way that it forces blood flow to the tip, hypothetically stretching it. Except what it can actually result in is scar tissue, pain and disfigurement. Probably best to stay well clear.
Sploshing is a wet and messy fetish. Less jumping in a swimming pool, more covering another person in lots of different food or other wet substances. Whether put on the face, body or clothing, the sensation of being covered results in sexual gratification for the “sploshee”. And maybe the “splosher”.
#10 Rusty Trombone
Rusty trombone is the name given to a type of analingus performed on a man where the person giving the oral reaches around to the penis and makes rapid stroking movements up and down the shaft. The reason it’s been dubbed this interesting name is because of the resemblance to someone playing a brass instrument. And, well, as for the rusty bit, we’ll leave that to your imagination.
These are our top 10 terms you’ve never heard of. If you can think of any more you think we’ve missed, then comment below!
The chances are you already own a sex toy – a trusty favourite that works for you, whether it’s a wand, a bells-and-whistles rabbit or a buzzing bullet vibe. And while some lucky women orgasm through penetration, for most it's the clitoris that holds the key to orgasmic bliss.