To paraphrase award-winning author Garth Marenghi, there are only three hetero sex positions worth doing: doggie, woman on top and "normal". But which one is best?
Medial doctor and sex therapist Zvi Zuckerman (aka the "Sex Doctor") recently explained the scientific, romantic and physical benefits of each position, along with their potential drawbacks. So if you're feeling frisky tonight, here's what to look forward to (and what to look out for!)
Dr. Zvi Zuckerman is the chief advisor for "virtual sex therapy clinic" Between Us. During a career spanning 50 years, he has held many positions (cough), including director of the Andrology and Sex Counseling Unit at the Rabin Medical center in Israel.
Recently, Dr. Zuckerman divulged the chief pros and cons of seven popular sex positions to the proprietors of the unfortunately named blog The Bro Bible. We've included the three most common — "missionary", "doggy style" and "cowgirl" — below.
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The perennially vanilla missionary position apparently got its name from religious Westerners in the 19th century due to its conservative, traditional and "civilised" nature. The more you know. Here's Dr. Zuckerman on the pros and cons.
Pros: "The missionary position is good for couples who want to get pregnant, since the man is able to penetrate deeply and ejaculate close to the cervix. The chance increases even more if the woman lifts her buttocks.
"Many couples consider it the most romantic position, since they can make eye contact and kiss throughout. It is also good for men with a smaller penis, since it allows the man to make more aggressive movements without the penis sliding out."
Cons: "It is harder for most women to reach an orgasm in this position, since the clitoris and the g-spot, located in the upper wall of the vagina, are less stimulated."
For many of us, the act of sex is just as important as eating food. And yet, while we constantly seek out new and varied culinary experiences, we tend to stick to the basics when it comes to sexual intercourse. This is a mistake that you should definitely rectify.
I never got why we signaled out canines with this position. Doesn't pretty much every mammal do it from behind? Maybe it's because dogs are dirty (ooh-er.) Anyways, here's Dr. Zuckerman on the pros and cons.
Pros: "As with the missionary position, there is a greater likelihood of achieving pregnancy in this position, since it allows for deep penetration. The woman can also enjoy double stimulation if the man stimulates her clitoris with his hands while penetrating.
"This position can be arousing for men who are turned on by female buttocks or the idea of anal sex."
Cons: "In this position the vagina shortens, and if the man moves aggressively he can accidently pound the uterus, causing the woman pain. Another con is a perceived lack of intimacy, since there is no eye contact."
The chances are you already own a sex toy – a trusty favourite that works for you, whether it’s a wand, a bells-and-whistles rabbit or a buzzing bullet vibe. And while some lucky women orgasm through penetration, for most it's the clitoris that holds the key to orgasmic bliss.
AKA the fat man's favourite (and sometimes only) position. Take it away Zuckerman.
Pros: "As with the missionary position, the couple can make eye contact. However, the woman controls the rhythm and the penetration depth. This position allows the man to pleasure the woman with his hands, such as caressing her breasts or stimulating her clitoris.
"Many men find it easier to control ejaculation while being passive; therefore sex therapists often recommend it for men who have trouble controlling their ejaculation. Sexologists also often recommend the position for women who have difficulties reaching an orgasm or have vaginismus, an involuntary contraction of the vaginal muscles, due to the complete control women have in this position."
Cons: "Some men don’t feel comfortable being passive. They may feel uneasy and threatened by the lack of control. Also, if the woman is very active in her movements the penis can slide out of the vagina, especially if the man has a smaller penis."
So there you have it. For (slightly) more adventurous types, head to the original post where the Sex Doctor breaks down the pros and cons of more positions.