Merriam-Webster just updated the official Scrabble dictionary for the first time in four years (buy it here), adding some new words like bizjet (opening with the plural bizjets gets you 120 points) — plus some old words that are finally deemed playable, including OK, ew, zen, and qapik. These new words will change gameplay, and for a little while, they might give you a new dickish way to win a Scrabble game.
Two-letter words are important. A Merriam-Webster editor tells the Associated Press they’re the “lifeblood of the game,” likely because they help players lay a longer word parallel to another one, doubling up their score with all the resulting perpendicular two-letter words. OK and ew are the 102nd and 103rd two-letter words to join the Scrabble dictionary.
Qapik and qapiks are only the 35th and 36th Scrabble words with a Q and no U—and that’s counting all the plurals. So they’ll affect gameplay too, much more than newly accepted buzzwords like sheeple, facepalm, twerk, and puggle.
But these buzzwords suggest a great dick move for casual players: You can convince your opponent to challenge them. Let’s say you have the new dictionary edition on the table, but you act shady enough about playing twerk or bizjets that you bluff your opponent into challenging. When your opponent loses their challenge, according to the rules, they lose their next turn. Nice.
Once you’ve scared your opponent off of challenging, try our other favourite dick move: play an unacceptable word. Nothing in the rulebook says you can’t! It’s authorised cheating! You can admit you cheated afterward, but that’s not strategic, just cathartic.
Board games are a safe place to play out conflicts with your family and friends, with the understanding that once the game is over, everyone is on good terms again. That also makes them the perfect place to take out all your petty frustrations and revenge fantasies, under the guise of good fun. Here's how to destroy your opponents with dick moves that will feel like cheats, but are all sanctioned by the rule book.
Right now you’ll have to buy the book for all the new words, as Hasbro hasn’t yet updated its online Scrabble dictionary. Get it fast, before all your Scrabble opponents read this post. And don’t try this at a tournament, you filthy casual. According to tournament sportsmanship rules, you’re not allowed to ask your opponent if they want to challenge.