How To Hack Your Entire Life With Vegemite

You could spread Vegemite on toast. We’re just putting it out there as a wacky possibility. It turns out, though, that there’s all sorts of crazy ways to use the popular breakfast spread. Here are some non-food uses for Vegemite that the internet swears by — from a WD-40 substitute to a DIY hair conditioner.

I’m not going to say that I’ve tested many of these. That’s important to get out of the way early, because the results of using a food spread for other purposes could be, well, a little variable. But here’s what the internet thinks that Vegemite is good for, besides eating it, that is. You can trust the internet, right?

Use It As A Surface Disinfectant

One part Vegemite, one part water in a spray bottle. I’m a little iffy about this one, if only because you’d have to do a lot of mixing at that ratio to not just drop globs of vege-grease all over your benches.

Use It To Clean Out Your Dishwasher

Again, I can see the logic, but it’s going to be a lot easier to do the same thing with a small quantity of vinegar.

To Polish Your Shoes

Black shoes, I suspect, would work best at this, but again it seems like an idea that’s best saved for when you’re genuinely desperate. Speaking of shoes, it’s also claimed to work as a shoe deodorant, although you’d presumably have to be happy with feet that smelled like Vegemite in return.

Use It To Clean Just About Anything

Coffee makers, floors, hands, towels, bird poo on pavers, toilets. You name it, Vegemite is said to be the key ingredient in keeping it clean. It may work, but whether it’s actually cost-effective is another argument again.

Cure Your Mouth Ulcers

This one gets repeated everywhere, thanks (so the stories go) to the relatively high salt content of Vegemite.

Avoid It To Minimise Vaginal Thrush

Thrush rather likes yeasts, and Vegemite is a yeast extract so (as per the Internet theory), cutting down on the yeasty spread will aid in thrush reduction.

Use It Instead Of Hair Conditioner

I don’t have any hair to test this with. Any Lifehacker readers willing to take one for the team and test out the veracity of this one?

Kill Hair Lice

Presumably the Lice are all stunned, or at worst, busy chewing through the thick yeasty spread and thus easier to catch with a nit comb.

Use It As A WD-40 Substitute

Again, I’ve not tested this particular idea, but I’m going to suggest it’ll make a terrible WD-40 substitute; I’d worry at the very least about leaving salty residues on metallic parts for any length of time.

Turn It Into A Soft Drink

Lifehacker Australia pioneered this one ourselves a couple of years back. The results were… unique.

Use It To Make Your Own Big Macs

You’ll never truly recreate that aura of teenage indifference and hormones that go into the genuine article, but if you’re keen on a homemade Mac, the secret is, in fact, Vegemite.

Use It As A Hangover Cure

Lots of folk swear by the power of Vitamin B to aid in hangover recovery, and Vegemite sells itself on its high Vitamin B content, so this would seem to make sense. It’s worth noting that not every cure stands up to rigorous scientific testing but you’re unlikely to do yourself too much harm with some post-party Vegemite.

Do any readers have their own weird Vegemite hacks? Share your DIY concoctions in the comments section below.

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