Nobody likes to be told they're doing something wrong, especially not in a workplace. Some people dislike it more than others; they may feel anger or embarrassment when they are being criticised, by their peers or their superiors. But feedback is an important part of professional development and learning to deal with criticism -- rather than stewing over it -- will contribute to a more fruitful career.
Negative feedback can be hard to take, but if you learn to let go of hurt feelings, you can use it to your advantage. Over at Forbes, executive career coach Tina Nicolai suggests creating a two-column list to turn criticism into actionable tasks.
The "sandwich" method of feedback, where you squish criticism between compliments to smooth it over, is played out and everyone knows it. Most of us cringe when we hear someone suggest it, and even when it works, it's obvious. Adam Grant, author and professor, says it's time to just give it up, and we agree.
Giving criticism isn't easy, especially if the person you're giving it to is sensitive. This approach lets you keep criticism in a positive light so your feedback comes across as constructive, not harsh.
When you're working on an idea, it's tempting to wait until it's nearing completion to get feedback. However, you may lock yourself out of ideas by waiting.
Your critics aren't always going to be the nicest people to interact with. To take the criticism effectively without the emotional hit to the self-esteem, ignore how it's delivered.
Constructive criticism is a pretty awesome tool for figuring out how to improve your efforts. At the same time, criticism might say more about the person giving it than it does your own work. It can be helpful to remember this if you have trouble taking criticism too personally.
Nobody likes getting criticism, which is silly. Criticism is a great way to improve yourself. If you want to get better feedback, and improve your reaction to it, respond to criticism with a heartfelt "Thank you."
In an effort to be kind, you might water down your critiques by saying something like "maybe it's just me but..." And while those qualifiers are coming from a good place, chances are the person receiving it will just think you're just being passive-aggressive and not so subtly hiding what you're really trying to say.
In an argument, the "straw man" tactic is used to set up a poor representation of your opponent's opinion and attack that to undermine them. It's a pretty crappy way to have an argument. If you're trying to give constructive criticism, however, you can use it to help avoid hurt feelings.
When you know someone can be really defensive, it makes giving them any sort of constructive criticism a battle you'd probably rather avoid. If something needs to be said, it all depends on the clarity of your message and how you communicate it.
Learning to take criticism isn't a skill most of us want to learn, but it's essential to getting an objective view of your strengths and weaknesses. This video gives you a start-to-finish primer on how to take, filter, clarify, and apply criticism you receive.
Most people know about the feedback sandwich: compliment, criticism, compliment. Many managers overuse that scheme, and the Losado Ratio may be a better alternative.
If someone is doing things wrong, don't accumulate a list offences for one massive criticism frenzy. Regularly let them know about mistakes so feedback becomes part of the routine.
Schumpeterianism, or "creative destruction", has a quite specific meaning in economic theory. For those of us looking to get things done, it means the ability to let go of old ways and embrace teardowns and criticism.
There are many situations where nuance, subtlety and carefully crafted diplomacy in communications are critical. But most of the time, plain directness can go a long way.
I've always envied people who can graciously accept constructive criticism. It seems I was not born with that trait, and throughout my career I've struggled with receiving feedback, even when it was entirely accurate. At the moment I hear the words of critique, my heartbeat quickens and my mind begins to race -- first in search of an explanation for this assault on my person and then for a retort to rationalise whatever actions are in question.
Criticism can be helpful, but all too often it comes in a form that's light on feedback and heavy on snark and sarcasm. That doesn't make it less valuable: you just have to learn how to manage your critics to get the most useful information out of them.
Sharing your thoughts is easy, but giving someone constructive criticism about their job performance or their quality of work is difficult. Instead of just telling someone that you disagree or dislike their work, if you give them valuable feedback that helps them improve, they're more likely to take it to heart.
