Anybody can spew out some half-arsed apology to save face, but a real apology takes serious introspection and sincerity, and focuses on helping the victim heal. It isn't easy to do, but this simple interactive tool can help if you're struggling. "It's good that you're here," the first screen reads when you load it up. It is good.
When touring different preschools for my daughter, I visited one where I got to observe the kids playing on the playground. While climbing the ladder on the slide, a little boy accidentally stepped on a little girl's finger, and she started crying. What happened next left me astounded.
Man, this last couple of weeks has seen a veritable tsunami of sexual-harassment allegations, right? And while some of the accused are silent or flat-out denying any culpability, others have been swift to apologise.
Apologies should be pretty straightforward. You screwed up, you feel bad, you express your remorse. But we're human, and humans are complicated. Many times, we apologise for the wrong reasons.
When inviting people into our homes, it can be easy to view everything with super-critical eyes. It's natural to want to apologise for these supposed shortcomings, but the word "sorry" should never escape your lips.
Several years ago, I had a co-worker -- we'll call her Jane -- who was assigned to work with our SVP's office on a high-profile event. The project (and the staff, for that matter) was pretty rough, and Jane would often come to the rest of us at the end of a stressful day to air her woes of angry emails, unreasonable demands and generally difficult people.
Simply saying "I'm sorry" isn't always enough. A decent apology should hit on multiple aspects of your wrongdoing. According to a recent study, there are six components you need to cover if you want to craft the perfect apology, and some are more important than others.
We all mess up from time to time, and when it affects someone else, it's good to apologise. But people have different ways of apologising. When saying you're sorry to someone, it might help to stick to their "apology language."
The only thing worse than a missed apology is a fake one. But even when you don't mean to, your friends may think a fake apology is exactly what you're giving them.
We're human, so we mess up from time to time. Apologies can set things back on the right course, but only if they're well-communicated. Psychologist and author Guy Winch breaks down the most important ingredients of a good apology so you can make sure you offer an effective one.
