I don’t usually like to spoil the ending of these videos, but it’s the journey — not the destination — that makes this particular taste test so “fun” (for you, not me). It’s been a while since I taste-tested, but back in the day I was known as the “nation’s leading Oreo journalist.” (At least least that’s how I thought of myself.)
Reviewing Oreos was a pleasant job. Even the bad ones, like the one flavored like Swedish Fish, had some redeeming qualities (usually the cookie). Taste-testing new and unusual candy corn? Not so much. Candy corn has never been my favourite candy, though pairing it with honey roasted peanuts makes it much more palatable, even enjoyable, so it was a pleasure to introduce Joel (a noted candy corn hater) to this Butterfinger-like pairing. It provided a nice moment between friends before the horror show that followed.
Having the best candy corn on the market wasn’t enough for Brach’s, I guess. For reasons that are unclear to me, they decided to create a bag of candy corn with six new flavours, each one representing a different aspect of the Thanksgiving meal. There’s turkey, stuffing, green beans, sweet potato pie, ginger-glazed carrot, and cranberry sauce, and the overall effect is a Yankee Candle pitch meeting gone terribly wrong. (Just kidding. The reasons are clear. It’s because dummies like me will buy it “just to see.”)
I won’t tell you my favourite (if it can even be called that), and I won’t tell you which I hated the most. You’ll have to watch the video, if that’s something you wish to learn. If you are a fan of watching me suffer — and who isn’t? — I think you’ll be pleased. After all, I did this so you wouldn’t have to, but I also did it for the attention, and it would be downright cruel to withhold that from me.