Tagged With marriage

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Most people will experience feelings of deep loss and distress after a long-term relationship breakup. Despite populist writings that love lasts forever, the divorce statistics across various countries tell us that up to two in three marriages end. If these statistics were to take into account the number of nonmarital long-term relationships that end, then the statistics would be much higher.

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As a society, we tend to look at breakups and divorce as a failure. But a relationship ending doesn't mean it wasn't successful in some way. Sometimes a fling is ideal for both parties, sometimes a long marriage ending is the only chance for a new beginning, and every relationship teaches you something you didn't know before.

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A wedding proposal deserves a little spectacle. Not an obnoxious viral-video stunt, but something to make your partner feel special. Putting some planning into it is an act of love. I talked to January of Engaged by January, a proposal planning service, about what to do - and what not to do - when you propose. And it's all advice you can use on your own.

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Why do people in happy relationships sometimes wind up cheating? According to relationship expert Esther Perel, the answer lies in self-exploration and has very little to do with the partner who is being cheated on.

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Relationships are hard. Parenting is hard. Combine those two and you're in for some bumps in the road large enough to rival those rutted rainforest paths that break your axle and pop your tires. No two people can agree on everything. Not even, or especially not, how to raise a kid to be a functional member of society.

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If you have spent your whole life dreaming of getting married while wearing an ivory princess gown paired with a lacy cathedral bridal veil, surrounded by 500 of your nearest and dearest friends, this is not the blog for you. But if you like the idea of actually having a good time on your wedding day and in the period leading up to it, read on.

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When you have babies and small kids, people give you so much advice — breast-feed, bottle-feed, co-sleep, use an infant straight-jacket, get an electric swing that achieves as much noise and velocity as a rocket — that you can't even remember it all. But one thing I do remember is that everyone insisted we make time for a "date night" at regular intervals.

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The first important decision a married couple makes is ... how to get married. Black tie at the Ritz? Clambake at the shore? Backyard potluck? Research shows you might be better off with a cheap - but well-attended - wedding. Scott Stanley and Galena K. Rhoades, professors and researchers for the Institute of Family Studies, report that while the cost of weddings has been rising, the number of guests has been falling.

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We don't like to admit it, but a marriage (or any long, cohabiting relationship) looks less like an early romance and more like a business partnership. As organisational psychologist Adam Grant and his wife Allison Sweet Grant explain in Redbook, married life involves a lot of compromise and negotiation. They offer four negotiation techniques for avoiding unhappy compromises.

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Most of us make resolutions to improve only ourselves: We vow to cut out sugar, work out three days a week, dust off the resume and start the job hunt for real. In general, resolutions tend to be very me-focused -- willpower, weight loss, self-care.

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Getting married is one of the biggest life decisions you'll ever make - especially if you're determined to stick it out through thick and thin. According to relationship psychologist and author Eli Finkel, it's important to assess long-term compatibility before tying the knot. These are the questions you should be asking.

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Have you ever had a moment of connection with a stranger? I'm not talking about a romantic or sexual connection (though those are nice too), but more of a quick smile as you pass on the street, or a one-off joke shared while waiting in the grocery-store line, or some other brief, shared experience that made you feel that stranger was actually special and could have, in other circumstances, been a friend? I love those moments, which are few and far between, because they make me feel like the universe of potential friends is bigger than I'd thought. I've always wondered why those moments happen - why they happen with one person and not another, or at one time and not another.

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A mum of two, Rachel Rabkin Peachman realised that as she holds down the metaphorical fort in her family - she's the one who books dental appointments, remembers to pack jazz shoes, and knows exactly where the snow pants are stored if anyone asks - her husband gets to be the "fun parent", the one who builds literal forts with the kids. She unpacks the disparity in her essay "Sharing the Parenting Spotlight", explaining how easily mums and dads get locked into distinct (and often gendered) parenting roles, and how unfair that is for everyone.