When you're going about your day-to-day, it's easy to put important questions about your career - what you really want to do, how you get there - on the backburner as you complete the tasks you need to get done now. And who wants to think about work in the few hours we have off?
Tagged With goals
Do you feel as though your social life is out of control? Maybe you (or your kids) have events every evening, when all you want to do is spend a quiet night at home. Maybe you feel like you're spending too much time "touching base" and "picking brains" with people you aren't close to, and not enough time with your friends. Maybe your in-laws want you to spend every Sunday having dinner with them, and you... don't.
Buddying up can help you reach your fitness resolutions - or whatever goal you happen to be chasing. But you don't have to work out together to help each other (couples, breathe a sigh of relief).
Welcome back to Mid-Week Meditations, Lifehacker's weekly dip into the pool of stoic wisdom, and a guide to using its waters to reflect on and improve your life.
Just as important as setting New Year's resolutions is figuring out how we reach them, and not getting so bogged down in work that we forget to take care of ourselves. On the podcast Call Your Girlfriend, hosted by the journalist Ann Friedman and Aminatou Sow, co-founder of Tech Lady Mafia, human rights technologist Sabrina Hersi Issa advises scheduling a Personal Inventory Day each month as a way to regularly take stock of where your time is going.
New Year's resolutions are usually centred around a big aspirational goal: I'll work out every day, I'll write a book, I'll never eat junk food. But most of us fail at our resolutions. One problem is that we're setting our goals too high. If you want to reach a huge goal, first you have to set a small one.
From across the coffee shop, I noticed a gentleman walking in with a computer. Not a laptop, mind you. With both hands, he carried a full-on desktop, monitor and console included. Surely he's not ... I thought to myself -- but I was wrong. He plopped the machinery down on a table, plugged in, and ordered his coffee while the rest of us looked on in horror.
January 1, 2018 is no different than December 31, 2017. You probably woke up with big plans to "really make some changes this year," but you know what? It's not going to work. Why? Because you've already decided that waiting until the new year to become the new and improved you is the right course of action.
In 2017, for the first time in my life, I actually stuck to a resolution. What's more, I'd failed at the same resolution -- to make a budget and stick to it -- for many previous years. Now, if you think there's something shameful in a grown person not being able to handle her finances, you're right!
About ten years ago, I went to a New Year's Day brunch party. Frankly, I hadn't really wanted to go. That particular time in my life was a low point; I'd just gone through a breakup and was feeling unusually forlorn, and I wanted to wallow at home. But the hostess was a good friend and she had invited other interesting, cool people to a good restaurant... so I dragged my feeble, mildly hungover self downtown.
Staying motivated enough to work toward our goals can be tough. The minutia of life can get in the way of our lofty dreams - which is where the non-zero method comes in. The idea is simple: Do just one thing every day that help you move toward what you want to achieve. Even if that's just performing one sit up or drinking a glass of water, at least you'll have made some progress.
Rather than putting the time and effort into promoting self-control, many organisations continue to favour focusing on goals, irrespective of how they are achieved. The general obsession by some organisations with outputs, reports, and metrics, signals to employees that performance is paramount, whatever the cost.
In August 2015, I boldly proclaimed that I would become a "deadlifting badarse". In my own world, that meant being able to deadlift 136kg. I struggled with 93kg at the time, so 136kg felt like a dream goal, the kind a four-year-old might blurt out. Then, last week I finally deadlifted 125kg for the first time!
Talking about your goals publicly can be a good way to motivate yourself to do better. However, you may want to wait until you've taken the first step before making an announcement to really take advantage of the effect.
We all have goals. Some might be career orientated, others may involve learning a new hobby or reigniting an old one.
It can sometimes be hard to achieve them. Maybe you're too busy ("Down time? What's that?") or find it difficult to get started. Perhaps motivation becomes a problem after you get started.
The excuses stop now -- you can find time if you really want something to happen. And we're here to help.
Goals are easy to set but hard to reach, and maintaining your motivation is everything (which is why focusing on a system is so much better than focusing on the goal itself). A recent study published in the Journal of Consumer Psychology sheds some light on what motivates us best.