Tagged With feminism

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I knew even before I had a daughter that I was going to raise her to laugh in the face of sexist stereotypes, to be whoever she wanted to be and to do her part in keeping the world safe for others to do the same. And then we got the ultrasound and it turned out I was having a boy.

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Uptalk used to seem like a bad thing. The "Valley girl" speech pattern, wherein a speaker's statements end with an upward inflection that makes them sound like questions, was first recognised by linguists in the 1970s and was long mocked as a sign of unseriousness. In 1993, New York Times writer James Gorman admitted there might be some uses, but he feared its use by authority figures like aeroplane pilots.

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Since I got married, my "love language" has become the love language of picking your crap up off the floor -- because nothing kills romance or libido faster than cleaning up after someone like a 1950's housewife. And yet this is the norm for many heterosexual new parents: That the woman, whether she works or not, will do most of the labour (much of it unseen) around child-rearing and housekeeping.

We may have had egalitarian relationships pre-kids. We may anticipate that we'll enjoy a pristinely fair division of labour post-kids. But when the actual baby arrives -- well, it can be like a bomb going off in your marriage.