Why Champagne Is Better Than Beer for Your Super Bowl Party

Beer is the official beverage of football, but perhaps it shouldn’t always be. When it comes to the biggest game of the year (in the United States), the best drink to serve at a Super Bowl party is — in my expert, esteemed, and highly sought-after opinion — Champagne.

Your football party is, after all, a party, and nothing says “party time” like popping a bottle of Champagne (or some other sparkling wine, if you’re on a budget). Only two teams get to play this game per year and, if one of those happens to be your favourite, you deserve a bubbly, festive treat for helping them make it all the way. (They could not have done it without your support and strict observance of game day superstitions, after all.)

Vibes and general merriment aside, Champagne is also the best pairing for greasy, salty food. It’s the great palate cleanser, the bright tongue re-setter, the clean sweep your mouth needs after seven hot wings and 3/4 cup of onion dip. Champagne’s acidity and effervescence clears away the unctuousness of a cheese pizza, the saltiness of a plate of nachos, and the greasiness of a chicken wing, allowing you to eat more pizza, nachos, and chicken wings. Is that not what you want? Is that not why you threw a party in the first place? To gorge yourself on Doritos, watch commercials, and be merry?

Again, if you feel that this move is cost prohibitive, there’s no shame in grabbing a cheap bottle of sparkling wine from Italy, Spain, or the wine-producing regions of the United States. A 750-milliliter bottle of Trader Joe’s Blanc de Blancs costs six whole American dollars, is incredibly dry, and it tastes way better than it has any right to. (And thanks to the low amount of residual sugar, it’s less hangover-inducing than a lot of cheaper bubbly.)

If, due to weird hangups around gender and masculinity, you simply can’t imagine sipping wine on Super Bowl Sunday, there is always the Champagne of Beers. I don’t think it’s as palate cleansing as sparkling wine, but cheap, mostly flavourless beer is still a pretty good tongue resetter, and won’t fill you up like a microbrew.