In case you weren’t aware, cuffing season is upon us. This is a curious time of year, friends. A season where singles reach for the nearest eligible option and use them as a comfort blanket of sorts during the cooler months.
The top definition for cuffing season listed in Urban Dictionary reads:
The cold season when everyone’s coupling up, so you settle for a new bf/gf way below your standards. ~Or~ you’re one of the smart ones who cozies up w Coors Light and your pupper bff.
You get the idea.
Now, of course, the desire to find a partner right now does not mean you’re destined to settle for the wrong person. And getting coupled up in the cooler months absolutely doesn’t mean your romance will be a temporary one. But the phenomenon has a name for a reason, so I thought I’d do a little more digging to see why cuffing season is a thing and how singles can get the most out of it.
I chatted with Dr Lurve to learn more. Here’s what I learnt.
It kind of boils down to Netflix and chilling
It’s kind of strange to reduce your dating behaviour to the weather, but that’s precisely what all of this is about.
Dr Lurve explained that “During the hotter months, singles are more active in the dating world, going out and about with prospective partners, enjoying the sun, beach and socialising – with winter, we are more inclined to stay at home, cuddle up with a lover on the couch and tune into our favourite Netflix shows.”
But the seasonal idea of the cuffing period doesn’t exactly lend itself to deep love stories (which isn’t necessarily a bad thing).
As Dr Lurve describes it, the period tends to run from March through to September, and while there’s nothing to say relationships won’t last beyond that period – the general idea of cuffing season is that these flings burn out once the weather warms up.
Brutal, I know.
So, how can you successfully navigate cuffing season?
If you’re after a casual fling, that’s all well and good. Do you! As long as you’re clear about your intentions and both parties are on board, there’s nothing wrong with a seasonal romance.
On the other hand, if you’re interested in something more long-term, it’s worth being upfront about your needs and checking in that you and your date are on the same page. No one’s got time for mismatched goals, okay?
If you want to land a lover, try not to put too much pressure on yourself
Yes, this is a time of year that’s traditionally associated with being loved up. And yes, that can feel tough if you’re single and no longer want to be. But the best thing you can do, Dr Lurve said, is to give yourself a bit of a break.
“Dating is never easy, especially when you’re looking for the one. Oftentimes, people find their ‘person’ in the most unexpected ways, usually when they aren’t looking or trying hard at all – don’t put so much pressure on yourself when finding someone to date,” she said.
One of the best things you can do is take it easy. But if you do meet someone you’re into, give them some eye contact and flash them a smile. Dr Lurve shared that according to research commissioned by SmileDirectClub (a clear aligner brand, for transparency’s sake) eyes are the feature most Aussies (39%) are attracted to in a person, followed by your smile, at 33%.
May as well use the gifts you’ve got, hey?
And if things don’t work out, try to see it as a learning opportunity. “Even bad dates can turn into a dinner party anecdote,” Dr Lurve said. And I tend to agree.
So, go forth, date well and have a happy cuffing season.