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How to Ask Someone to Be a Job Reference

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How to Ask Someone to Be a Job Reference

Despite how much has changed in terms of how we search for jobs (we’ve come a long way from paging through the local newspaper’s classified ads section) and the hiring process now being largely virtual, there’s one practice that doesn’t seem to be going anywhere: having to provide references.

If you’re someone who gets anxious about asking other people for favours, this may be your least favourite part of the whole process. When a letter of reference is involved, you’re essentially asking someone to do unpaid work on your behalf. While that can be a lot to ask of someone, there are several ways to make life easier for your reference, letting you know that you appreciate the favour and respect their time. Here’s how to ask someone to be a job reference and make sure you’re being as helpful as possible.

Ask the person if they have the bandwidth

This post is inspired by a series of tweets from Emma Carew Grovum, a newsroom and product strategist, in which she provides tips for asking someone to serve as your reference. Her very first tip is to ask the person if they have bandwidth. Definitely do this; not only is it polite, but is also gives the person the chance to be honest with you about whether they have the time to devote to helping you out.

Don’t go in thinking you’re entitled to a reference

This one’s not part of Emma’s thread, but something related to keep in mind: Please don’t assume that your former boss, professor, or colleague will serve as your reference. It’s not part of their job and they don’t owe it to you (unless it was something you had previously discussed, in which case, you can skip this step). So instead of opening an email with “I’m going to need a reference for [job/program/etc],” go with the whole asking-about-their-bandwidth approach.

Give them plenty of time

Don’t wait until right before your application is due to ask someone to be your reference — especially if it involves writing a letter. This is another aspect of being respectful of their time. Maybe they would have been happy to write something up the previous week, but since you’ve gotten in touch so close to your application deadline it’s not a possibility, or puts them under a lot of pressure.

On the other hand, if you ask someone for a letter or to be a reference several months in advance of when the application is due, you’re giving them something else they have to keep track of, and, in effect, more work. The extra time is a good thing, but if you’re contacting them really far in advance, ask the potential reference if they want you to check in with them two weeks (or so) before the due date with a quick reminder.

Make their job as easy as possible

Back in Emma’s thread, she also stresses the importance of helping the person serving as your reference. Tell them about the position and what (you think) the organisation is looking for in a candidate. Give them the version of your resume that you’re using for the job, as well as your cover letter, and bring them up to speed on any of your relevant experience or achievements.

Along the same lines, if there’s something in particular you’d like them to highlight in their letter (or phone conversation), let the reference person know. They’re not mind readers, so unless you specifically tell them what you’d like them to mention — like a special project or award — they’re going to do their own assessment of your work history and pick their own highlights (which may not always align with yours).

Provide information on a potential phone call

If your reference is vouching for you via a phone call, be sure to give them the name and (ideally) the phone number of the person who may call them. (Or, if nothing else, at least the area code.) As Emma points out, a lot of people don’t answer calls from random numbers and area codes they don’t recognise.

Fill them in once you know what’s happening with the job

At this point, the reference is (at least somewhat) invested, so let them know what happened — even if you didn’t get the job. And if you did get the job, Emma advises telling your reference yourself, so they don’t hear about it on social media, or from someone else.

Don’t expect career advice

If you didn’t happen to get the job, do let your reference know, but leave it at that. It may be tempting to ask the person for career advice, or for help refining your resume or cover letter, but don’t do it. (If the reference offers that’s one thing, but don’t just jump into another request.)

Also, unless you know your reference well and have already established this type of mentoring relationship, do not ask them for their personal and/or professional contacts, or to “connect” you with someone else in the field. Finally, avoid asking them if they know of anyone who is hiring, or have suggestions of other places you should apply — that’s your job.

Thank them

Regardless of whether or not you got the job, thank the person for taking the time and energy to serve as your reference. It doesn’t have to be much — even a quick email works. The aim here is to show them that you are appreciative of their help.

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