I am usually not particularly charmed by videos of rich people “dealing” with being “trapped” in their mansions (or worse, singing), but that’s because most of those videos are tone deaf, cringey and just generally unhelpful. But this video from Ina Garten, the Barefoot Contessa, first of her name, is the opposite of all that.
This video is helpful. This video is charming. This video is funny. This video tells us how to make a giant cosmopolitan (before 10 am). The cosmo is a good drink that doesn’t get enough credit, because of sexism. When Ina notes (wryly), “nobody’s stopping by,” it’s both poignant and joyful, because a lack of extra humans (aw) means more cosmo for the Contessa (and Jeffrey? Maybe?? Where is that guy???).
Ina uses a giant cocktail shaker to make her large drink, and here is where class divisions may surface for some of us. I—a member of the petite bourgeoisie—only own one cocktail shaker, and it of a regular size. Luckily, another Instagram icon—Steak Diane—has an elegant solution: just use a giant mason jar.
If you have a large enough shaker, you can skip the pitcher step and just pour the ingredients—2 cups of good vodka, 1 cup of Cointreau or triple sec, 1 cup cranberry juice cocktail and half a cup of freshly squeezed lime juice—directly into the jar with a lot of ice, shake, and strain through a large kitchen sieve. If your jar isn’t quite that big, you can work in batches like Ina and Diane.
Now, some of you may think that the above is just a cute stunt, that we’re all having a little quarantine laugh, that making a giant cosmopolitan isn’t a hack. “What if I can’t drink it all?” you’re wondering, because you have no faith in yourself, me or Ina. “What if I fail?”
Oh, but my dear, what if you fly? Pre-batching a bunch of cocktails has always been The Move, and once your cosmo is properly diluted, it can be kept in the freezer and rationed out as needed, making the giant cosmo a bonafide isolation hack. These are, as Ina notes, stressful times; you can’t really be too prepared.