How To Quieten Down Your Toddler’s Noisy Toys

How To Quieten Down Your Toddler’s Noisy Toys
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When my son was a toddler, he had a train toy that used to chug at all hours of the day and night. There was no off switch and the damn thing was possessed, so we had to bury it in the basement in order to sleep at night. When it woke me up in the middle of the night (in my bed on the second floor), I’d had enough. I knew my kid liked it, but it was either the train or his mother; one of us had to go.

If you’ve ever had a toddler, you have a similar story. The toy you couldn’t turn off — or at least turn down. Why are they so loud? No, seriously, I want to know. So we can train our children to tune out our voices as early as possible?

We could get rid of all that singing, chanting plastic nonsense (but we won’t). Or we could simply outsmart it. With tape. Like @mommingonpurpose shows us on Instagram:

Tape. Over. The. Speaker.

If you already do this, you should have suggested it to the rest of us. If this never occurred to you as an option, you have some taping to do tonight.

You could also use stickers. Cute and effective.


    • Spoken like someone who’s never had kids.
      Because then every night you’d have to go take out the batteries of every goddamned noise maker, a surprising amount needing screws undone. And then you’d have to put them back in the next day when the kid discovers their favourite toy is “broke” and you realize that the only thing more annoying than the song the stupid train plays is your kid’s whining because it doesn’t play the song.

      I am overstating this a bit, and I must say I’ve never experienced the author’s situation of being woken up in the middle of the night by a noisy toy (I thank whoever I can that I have a decent sleeper). But I do use the tape-over-the-speaker trick for anything I think is too loud, which at one stage included the baby monitor. Even at low volumes, that thing was too loud…

      • So don’t buy toys with speakers in the first place then 😛

        Or if you’re even moderately handy, buy the toy, open it up and snip the speaker wire before giving it to the kid. Lights still flash but no noise.

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