Personally I love Twitter’s algorithmic timeline, but I know this makes me a cretin and a shill. The web toy Other Orders will take your timeline and re-sort it to your liking. You can get a chronological-order timeline; you can sort everyone’s tweets by the most likes or retweets, just to see the popular ones. Or let Other Orders analyse the text of these tweets and dig up the most apocalyptic, the most exclamatory, the most ashamed-sounding, the most “cop-like,” the most TED-talk-ish or the most goth.
Here, for example, are the gothest tweets from my timeline:
The saddest proverb: she who gets out of bed last makes the bed first.
— roxane gay (@rgay) September 11, 2019
Me: who ARE these people anyway?
*dig dig*
Me: OH. Well, then.
— carolyn ????️???????????????? (@papersquared) September 11, 2019
The most exclamatory:
FUCK YEAH! https://t.co/kIBpkqV1Of
— Mike Monteiro (@monteiro) September 11, 2019
The most liked:
me seeing my old teacher at the store pic.twitter.com/3XE15FWu6Q
— jaboukie? (@jaboukie) September 11, 2019
Go to Other Orders and dig up all kinds of tweets that Twitter is hiding.
If you’re not a big Twitter user, you can use the site’s filters on the 100 most popular books on Project Gutenberg. Here’s the gothest line from A Christmas Carol:
The Phantom slowly, gravely, silently, approached.
The second-most erotic line from Frankenstein:
They put it into a bed and rubbed it, and Daniel went to the town for an apothecary, but life was quite gone.
And the most Kafkaesque line from The Secret Garden:
No one believes I shall live to grow up.
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