How To Throw A 'Resource Party' 

Photo: Maskot, Getty Images

The harsh truth: A goal will start to dissipate when stuck inside a brain for too long. To move from that comfortable space of “I wish I could do it” to the thrilling realm of “Holy heck, I’m actually doing it”, it needs to be put out there. Spoken aloud. Shared with trusted friends. Given legs.

If you’re like me, you might tell one or two people about your goals to keep yourself accountable. That’s a good start. But author and blogger Erin Loechner takes the idea a leap further.

In an Instagram post, she suggests hosting a “resource party”. The reason? You know good people. Those good people know other good people. Now get all that goodness in one cosy room, add in some snacks, wine, index cards, Sharpies, and a bit of vulnerability, and you’ve just created a safe, invigorating space where dreams can become plans.

Loechner explains how it works:

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You know that thing you’ve been wanting to do?⁣ ⁣ ⁣ Climb Mt. Everest? Clean out your attic? Tailor those pants? Launch that project? ⁣ ⁣ I think you should do it RIGHT NOW. (I know, I know. You’ve got that weekend trip planned. Work’s insane. The calendar’s full: sports, weddings, getaways, family dentist appointments, school. Check, check, check, check. I get it.)⁣ ⁣ So don’t do it alone, that’s all.⁣ Throw yourself a resource party.⁣ ⁣ Here’s how it works:⁣ ⁣ 1. Gather 3-5 of your closest friends, and ask that they bring a few of their closest friends. You’ll end up with a circle of trusted folks you can squeeze into a living room, but I’ve had just as much success with a hotel lobby full of strangers.⁣ 2. Everyone: write your thing on an index card. The dream, the project, the plan, whatever. Get specific.*⁣ 3. Read it out loud to the room. Watch friends and strangers raise their hands to share the many ways, big and small, they can help. You want to run that marathon? A hand will raise: I can offer childcare while you train. Another: I have a discount code for running shoes. Another: I’m training, too, if you need an accountability partner.⁣ 4. Exchange info. Say thank you.⁣ 5. Go forth and raise your hand for others.⁣ ⁣ Soon enough, you’ll have a room full of dreamers who have all-the-sudden become doers, with the help of nothing but Sharpies and each other.⁣ ⁣ It’s no small thing, sharing our big things. Asking for help. Saying it all out loud.⁣ ⁣ You’ll see. ⁣ ⁣ *The more specific, the better. I once threw a resource party where a woman wrote, and I am not kidding here, “I want to feed a penguin.” And OF COURSE the man standing across the room from her was the brother-in-law of the HR director for a local zoo, and OF COURSE he asked a favor, and the HR director made a request to a friend in PR, who checked with guest relations and so on and so forth until this random stranger with an index card and a dream was offering Coco the penguin her afternoon krill. ????

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  1. Gather 3-5 of your closest friends, and ask that they bring a few of their closest friends. You’ll end up with a circle of trusted folks you can squeeze into a living room, but I’ve had just as much success with a hotel lobby full of strangers.⁣
  2. Everyone: write your thing on an index card. The dream, the project, the plan, whatever. Get specific.*⁣
  3. Read it out loud to the room. Watch friends and strangers raise their hands to share the many ways, big and small, they can help. You want to run that marathon? A hand will raise: I can offer childcare while you train. Another: I have a discount code for running shoes. Another: I’m training, too, if you need an accountability partner.⁣
  4. Exchange info. Say thank you.⁣
  5. Go forth and raise your hand for others.⁣

Many accountability groups exist for specific industries (such as freelance writing), but I like the idea of throwing a party where guests can share their unexplored dreams. For instance, I’ve always wanted to learn how to play one good song on the ukulele. When you invite friends, ask them to bring along others with unique interests, specialities and connections.

Everything changes when you release your goals into the world, and are willing to let others help you achieve them. Take that first big step while meeting new friends and munching on charcuterie.


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