On Christmas day, you’re probably going to be stuck with your extended family. This means awkward small talk with distant cousins, boring conversations with doddering old aunties and pointed questions about why you haven’t got married/moved out/lost weight yet. In these situations, you need to shake things up a bit. You need to hijack the Christmas playlist. You need to blast out some Crudbump. [NSFW]
Crudbump is a US-based comic artist and rapper who is perhaps most famous for his foul-mouthed ode to Christmas. Appropriately titled “F*ck You If You Don’t Like Christmas”, the song sticks the boot into various pet hates and foibles before descending into a gibbering defense of consumerism. The “F-word” is said frequently, which makes this a perfect ditty to rile up your annoying extended family.
For the past few years, I’ve fired this baby up multiple times on the lead-up to December 25 and the tune never gets old. (Still not sure I’m completely down with reindeer dogs, though.) You can download the song on iTunes here. Slip it into the carol rotation between Mariah Carey and Bing Crosby and watch the chaos fly!
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