“ATTENTION ARTISTS: Sometimes your friends will have successes, and you’ll be jealous, even if you don’t want to be,” says author and Dinosaur Comics creator Ryan North in an inspirational Twitter thread.
We know it hurts. Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images
He has two tips for dealing with that jealousy, which apply to anyone who’s envied a colleague:
- The first is for your friend’s benefit: When you congratulate them, don’t let your jealousy leak in. You might be tempted to mention that you were applying for the same promotion, or trying a similar project that went nowhere. “That just makes the person feel bad,” says North, and draws the attention back to you.
- The second is for you: It’s normal to have trouble being happy for your friend even when you know you should. Think selfishly: You want successful friends, don’t you? The better off they are, the more they can help you down the road. Just don’t ask for any favours right away; set yourself a reminder for a few weeks or months down the road.
We’ll add our own: Promote their success wholeheartedly, in public. It builds some goodwill, plus it forces you into thinking in terms of real appreciation and adulation.