English Makes No Sense. At All.

The other day I overheard a conversation that began with, "I'm not racist but..."

Bad start.

It followed with a bog-standard conversation about how people who move to this country should drop everything and dedicate all of their time and energy into learning to speak English. IMMEDIATELY.

Sure, learn to speak English. But here's a newsflash people: English is insanely hard and it makes no goddamn sense, like at all.

This video does a great job of explaining some of the ways in which English flat out just doesn't work as a consistent thing. I mean most languages are like that, but English is absolutely the worst. 100%.


    That English is the hardest / least-consistent language is an old canard.

    I've attended language classes in other countries, where students come from many different language backgrounds. Aside from the immediate observation that many countries teach English to kids better than Australia has done in nearly 50 years, many will offer alternate "harder" languages e.g. Polyglot Poles thought their native Polish was harder than other languages they learnt; some parts of Spain find bits of Spanish grammar so unwieldy that they simply don't use them. Then of course you have countries where the spoken and written languages have zero relationship.

    This video forgot the elephant in the room. 'W' should be double V.

    And that adding an 'e' to the end of words changes how the preceding vowel is pronounced. E.g dim, dime or tim, time.

    And yes, what is the deal with one/won and two/to. Teaching a kid to read uncovers the utter stupidity of language amalgamation.

    ...Yes it's 'ch', but not in orchestra.


      Another rule with an exception. Here's a word puzzle for your friends: What is a three letter word where the E on the end *doesn't* change the vowel?
      The answer is 'axe'.

        But adding an 'e' at the end of axe doesn't make sense?

          They mean that the 'e' on the end doesn't change the way you would pronounce the preceding vowel. For instance in 'axiom' you sound out the 'a' as you would in axe, so the presence of the 'e' at the end doesnt change that.

    Only English-only speakers think English is hard. It's laughable. It's incredibly easy to get the basics of it. Sure, you'll make grammatical errors here and there, and probably entirely miss the localisation, but you will get your point across.

    Meanwhile, complex languages have: pronouns for everything, gendered speech; formality; variations on "the" (see: German) depending on the previous; strict grammar; etc.

      In comparisons, I would agree that English grammar is easy (as it's so inexact). But I would debate that English spelling is difficult.

    Haha, 'English is difficult to learn' - Haven't smirked that much in a while! It is such an easy language to learn with hardly any grammatical rules compared to numerous other languages. Out of the four compulsory languages we had to study at my German high school (namely English, Russian, French, and Spanish), it was by far the easiest! Only native English speakers will try to tell you that it's a difficult language to learn. I have a feeling it's to cover themselves and their complete inability to formulate a grammatically correct sentence in their mother tongue!

      It reminds me of dog-owners who say "Fido doesn't do this because BREED REASON", to cover their complete lack of training skills or intention.

      The pathetic standard of language in our schools only ten years after the cessation of grammar teaching was demonstrated by one of my HSC English teachers who was pretty much taxed by anything beyond "naming words" and "doing words", couldn't spell to save her life and had no ability to understand the nuances of language in a text.

    I call shenanigans here, almost every article I've ever read, says English is the easiest language, particularly when you compare it to Chinese, or Arabic etc, etc.

    English is trivially simple to learn to the point you can get by, but it's complex to obtain fluency in.

    It's also one of the most forgiving languages in the world. If someone says "Which clock, please" you would know to answer "5pm".

    Now, Japanese on the other hand.

Join the discussion!

Trending Stories Right Now