Porridge Toppings, Ranked

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Porridge is great, for many reasons. Chief among them -- the malleable nature of it. Mold your porridge, let it take the shape of your innermost desires. Porridge is a blank canvas, paint my friends. Paint.

Toppings are where porridge comes alive. Here are my favourites, ranked.

But first: a disclaimer. This is my list. Some people add some wild ass shit to their porridge. I'm not here to judge. I support you in your quest.

Secondly, this isn't instagram porridge. It's every day, make it at work porridge. It's not savoury porridge either. That's a whole different universe and I don't want to dip my toes in that pool.

With that said, let's begin.

The List

1. Maple Syrup Everyone uses honey. They shouldn't. Honey's alright, but it's no maple syrup.

2. Blueberries Blueberries are awesome. Help you burn fat. A bit less sugary than other fruit. Get really soft and mushy in the heat.

3. Strawberries Add a couple of strawberries in there. Treat yourself. It's like finding buried treasure.

4. Bananas Bananas are great. Treat yourself.

5. Chia seeds Good when you want to pretend you're being healthy.

6. Caramelised apples A lot of extra effort, but good for when you feel like luxury oats.

7. Brown sugar It makes it go all brown and hell yes it's the best.

8. Milk I don't add milk to mine anymore, because I'm trying to eat less dairy, but a splash of cold milk on steaming hot porridge. Then it makes that little moat around it? Perfection.

9. Walnuts Alright, let's talk nuts. Some people add almonds to porridge. Those people are going down a dark path. If you're gonna add a nut, it had better be light and crunchy. LIKE WALNUTS.

10. Raspberries Raspberries are pretty good. They're no strawberries but yeah. Still pretty good.


Here are terrible toppings I've seen other people put on porridge. Humanity was a mistake.

1. Condensed Milk My wife does this. I have no idea why. Not sure why I married her to be honest.

2. White Pepper Lifehacker Editor Chris Jager adds pepper to his porridge cause he's the worst.

3. Grapes Yeah nah. Too big, too dominating a flavour. NO THANKS.

Let the debates begin! What are some of your favourite porridge toppings?


    errrrr.... you forgot cinnamon and honey...

    Its not popular any more, but try treacle. Somewhere between honey and maple syrup, its flavor is different enough to be considered.

    Great on damper bread as well. Or in.

    Frozen blueberries and cinnamon is a favourite. But lately been buying either:

    - Lowan muesli with apricots and almonds, or
    - Macro Muesli Maple Almond

    and micing 50/50 with my regular oats (themselves a blend of Lowan rolled oats and Macro 5 grain porridge).

    I use one cup of porridge for two adults, plus one cup of water and one cup of milk.

    This article speaks to me on a deep level Serrels. I'd have banana higher, and the mix of maple syrup + banana is aces. Also a throw in for the weight-training inclined: chocolate protein powder + banana is amazeballs.

    Freshly roasted almonds (I cheat and put raw almonds in the microwave for arounf 1.5mins).

    Backstrap treacle and cream. I cook my oats in milk instead of water too for extra creaminess

    My favourite is Brown Sugar. Condensed Milk is good on crumpets, not sure about porridge, though. Might have to try that.

    But chocolate is good. Chocolate porridge. Yum.

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