Couch Potato To Wonder Woman: Month Two

In an effort to transform myself from Couch Potato to Wonder Woman, the first step was to get off the couch. The next step was to make it a lifestyle.

What did I do?

Starting of slowly was super important, and it has allowed me to build more activity into my routine as my energy levels rise โ€“ yes, rise! Youโ€™d think with all the workouts Iโ€™d be an exhausted mess, but it turns out all those fitness bloggers werenโ€™t lying โ€“ exercise gives you energy. I mean, I knew this from a scientific standpoint โ€“ endorphins and all that โ€“ but I think there was a part of me that didnโ€™t want to believe it, that was using it as an excuse. No more.

But first โ€“ roadblock.

Three full days of bedridden nausea/headaches/bodyaches/fever/depression โ€“ you name it. My body and brain went full โ€œnopeโ€ on me and I started panicking. February is a short month. How do I come back from this? Do I try and keep going anyway (bad idea)?

Rest. Is. Important.

Youโ€™re going to get sick. Youโ€™re going to get sore. Life happens. Roll with it, and just pick everything up from where you left off. A few days without working out, or a few crappy meals isnโ€™t going to undo all of your hard work. This is a lifestyle change, not a short-lived โ€œfadโ€ plan you need to stick to religiously to get results.

After I recovered, it was time to get back into it. Hereโ€™s the activities I engaged in this month. So many activities.


Yoga

As you may have read last month, I used to think that yoga was a boring thing pseduo hippies did so they could talk about their chakras in a room full of people paying them for their โ€œwisdomโ€.

Now, thank to the lovely Adriene of โ€œYoga with Adrieneโ€ on YouTube (I may have referred to her as โ€œmy yoga instructorโ€ to my amused co-workers on more than one occasion) yoga is a daily part of my life. Iโ€™m definitely more bendy, my posture is better, by upper back pain is gone and I find I understand my body more โ€“ helping me in all my other activities. I evangelically recommend yoga to everyone who feels a bit โ€œblerghโ€.

Iโ€™m not at โ€œfancy silhouette on the beachโ€ poses level yet, but give it time. Iโ€™m so gonna be one of those people โ€“ and Iโ€™m not even sorry.

I do a 30 minute video every morning, and a 20 minute video before bed. This is the one I use after a big day of hiking.

Yoga 5eva. #namaste


Hiking

Speaking of hiking, my little group is growing! Every week we alternate between the mountains and the sea, and the hikes are getting more and more intense.

I get to spend time with friends, explore our beautiful country, and expand on my badassery with survival skills โ€“ like removing a gazillion leeches off my feet.


HIIT

With my endurance up a little from hiking, I was ready to tackle some high intensity cardio workouts โ€“ in the comfort of my own home where no one could judge me, of course.

Fitness Blender are brilliant, and have a whole bunch of workouts depending on what youโ€™re after. I get bored easily, so love this one. It only takes 25 minutes and no exercise is repeated.

I did these videos in place of tennis this month, since my tennis was super busy. In the past I would have just not done anything at all. Yay for progress!


Weights

I gave my weights routine a really good crack this month. Twice a week โ€“ and Iโ€™m more than ever. I donโ€™t make eye contact with anyone at the gym, still. The super-fit people still intimidate me and I always feel like they are juding me.

I put a good podcast in my ears, and lift. Iโ€™ve found if I do weights first, then a Fitness Blender video (while Iโ€™m still on an endorphin high) then finish it off with yoga I feel amazing on days I donโ€™t have a more โ€œstructuredโ€ workout โ€“ like hiking or axe throwing.


Axe Throwing

For real. Iโ€™m in an actual, real life Axe Throwing League.

Competitive axe throwing is tough. My axe throwing arm (lol) and shoulder were sore for an entire week after my first session. It requires a good amount of strength and co-ordination (of which I have very little at the moment) and a whole lot of perseverance (of which I proudly excel at).

I seriously do feel like a badass. Wonder Woman with axe throwing skills. Hell yeah.


Running

Well, letโ€™s call it jogging for now. I am slow. I take so many breaks. And you know what? It doesnโ€™t matter. Because Iโ€™m still out there, still giving it a go.

I used to get teased a lot for how I run when I was at school. My legs do this funny โ€œflick out to the sidesโ€ thing. But you know what? Who cares.

My legs work. I am grateful for that. And Iโ€™m using them.

I genuinely surprised myself at how far I can run (only 1km without stopping for now, but wow โ€“ thatโ€™s huge for me). Oh, and I just scored some decent running shoes (although it should be obvious, I do not recommend Converse) โ€“ so that might help even more.

Before yโ€™all recommend Zombies Run to me โ€“ I worked out how to cheat, so thereโ€™s no point in me playing the game anymore. Iโ€™ll stick with blaring Prodigy and Beyonce in my ears while I pretend Iโ€™m better at this than I am for now.


Roller Derby

Hands up if youโ€™ve seen Whip It and wanted to be Ellen Page. *raises hand*

Thatโ€™s how I ended up here. Roller derby name suggestions are welcome.

Not content with being in one kind of league, I also joined a roller derby league. I have it on good authority Iโ€™m likely to end up with many, many injuries from this completely badass full contact rollerskating sport that Iโ€™m yet to fully understand.

But for now, Iโ€™m taking it slow (like everything else in this challenge) with some learn to skate classes. It turns out you do a lot of squatting in roller derby, and because you skate in one direction, you end up with one of your glutes and thighs bigger than the other. So Iโ€™ll have one axe throwing arm, and one roller derby lower half. Iโ€™m going to have to balance this out in my weights sessions.


What did I eat?

Let me remind you once again why I listen to my personal trainer/nutrition and health couch, Thor.

The dude clearly knows what he is doing.

He has me eating more calories than I have in my life, from a selection of good foods โ€“ hereโ€™s a reminder of some examples of whatโ€™s considered โ€œgoodโ€:

    Fats
  • Avocado
  • Nuts
  • Coconut oil
  • Cheese (yes!)
  • Flaxseed Oil
  • Dark Chocolate
    Protein
  • Lean red meat
  • Lean poultry
  • Fish
  • Eggs
  • Milk & Cheese
    Carbs
  • Rice
  • Bread
  • Potatoes
  • Veggies
  • Fruit
  • Oats

I just have to hit a macro intake โ€“ a certain amount of carbs, fats and protein worked out specifically for me by my trainer on a daily basis. I know how much Iโ€™m having by logging it in MyFitnessPal, but am quickly learning even without having to use the app what I can eat to get my macros balanced.

I love cooking, and rarely eat out, so it hasnโ€™t been a huge challenge for me. I eat oats with fruit for breakfast, have sandwich ingredients in my office kitchen at work (avocado, roast beef or chicken, salad stuff, cheese with a nice soy and linseed bread), snack on bananas, nuts, yogurt and more cheese.

For Dinners, Iโ€™ve managed to get myself obsessed with saving money cooking from Sarah Wilsonโ€™s Simplicious book, which focuses on โ€œjust eating real foodโ€. I have a fridge and freezer full of stock, par-cooked vegetables, pre-sliced fruit, serving size portions of roast meats, homemade pesto and a whole bunch of other ingredients I pull together that meet my macro requirements. She makes it look prettier than I do. Meals like this:

This:

And this:

Also, Iโ€™ve managed to develop a slight obsession with boiled eggs. They are perfect little protein packs you can take on hikes, have in your bag, or in the fridge at home โ€“ just waiting for you to feel a bit hungry but not want to feel to full before a workout or before your main meal.

Surely I give myself a cheat day, though? Nah. I suck at those. Before I know it Iโ€™ll have eaten an entire tub of ice cream, half a batch of homemade choc-chip cookies and one of those giant KFC family buckets. And Iโ€™ll feel awful. What I do is give myself a โ€œcheat mealโ€ after my giant epic hikes. Although something strange is happening, even with those.

Iโ€™m okay with just something indulgent, like a hot chocolate. I donโ€™t want to eat fried food anymore. It makes me feel sick. And this is coming from someone who used to eat a ten pack of nuggets for second breakfast.

Progress!


Soโ€ฆdo you have any results?

This month I lost a grand total of *drumroll please* 2kg. Thatโ€™s double last month, and brings my total loss in two months up to three kilograms โ€“ but itโ€™s still not the huge drop youโ€™d expect from someone doing daily yoga, grueling hikes, axe throwing, jogging, roller derby, HIIT training, and eating almost perfectly. Thereโ€™s infomercials that tell me people lost more weight than that in less time just standing on a vibrating platform.

But you know what? Those infomercials lie, and Iโ€™m perfectly okay with what the scales say. Last month I was a little let down, but this month I genuinely feel so much more comfortable in my skin I donโ€™t give a damn what the scale tells me.

My progress photos arenโ€™t a whole lot different to last month either (excuse the 6am bleary-eyed husband potato photos. I might have to do these properly for you one day).

Iโ€™ve now lost 4cm from by bust, 4cm from my hips and 12cm from my waist. My body fat percentage is down a total of 3.2%. Iโ€™m now officially โ€œhealthyโ€ according to all of those (often inaccurate, but anyway) online calculators.

I feel incredible. I love my new lifestyle, I have way more energy than before, and Iโ€™m wasting far less time scrolling through social media. I feel like Iโ€™m living my life โ€“ gaining new skills, opportunities and confidence. I know I sound like an awful #inspo influencer, but I promise Iโ€™ll always keep it real, no matter how bendy and fast and strong and badass I get.

Whatโ€™s next?

Letโ€™s take a look at โ€œThe Planโ€:

  • Strength (Iโ€™m lifting twice a week now, and am slowly upping my weights. The axe throwing is helping, too!)
  • Flexibility (Daily Yoga is my religion now. I will be able to hold my foot above my head soon)
  • Endurance (Hiking, running, derby, axe throwing โ€“ I can break a sweat and not feel like Iโ€™m dying)
  • Eating food that fuels me (I definitely have the basics nailed, now might be time to go more in depth)
  • Killing a man with my bare hands AKA badassery (Iโ€™m throwing axes, surviving in the wilderness and am on my way to being a terrifying Roller Derby player)

This month I definitely amped it up a little, so now it might be time to set some concrete goals. Do I want to run 5km? Complete a two day hike? Diversify my workouts even more? Focus on specific muscle groups? Finally start martial arts? Iโ€™m open to your suggestions!

You can follow along, even join in, with #couchpotatotowonderwoman on Instagram. Speaking of which, check out these legends:

Thereโ€™s a whole bunch of people doing this now, which is super motivating.

As always, if you have any questions, suggestions, or thereโ€™s extra info youโ€™d like to know โ€“ just let me know in the comments below.

Until next month, Lifehacker.

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