Be More Likeable In Any Situation By Following The ‘Platinum Rule’

Be More Likeable In Any Situation By Following The ‘Platinum Rule’

You’ve probably been told the “golden rule” at some point in your life, but it’s not always ideal for those times you want to ooze charisma. That’s where the “platinum rule” comes in.

Picture: Tech Cocktail

The golden rule says that you should treat others with the same respect you would want to be treated with. Travis Bradberry at The Good Men Project suggests there’s a better approach to take when you want others to like you more:

The Golden Rule — treat others as you want to be treated — has a fatal flaw: it assumes that all people want to be treated the same way. It ignores that people are motivated by vastly different things… The Platinum Rule — treat others as they want to be treated — corrects that flaw.

You’re not pandering to them or sucking up, you’re just doing the extra courtesy of appealing to who they are as an individual. As Bradberry suggests, If someone likes public recognition, give it to them. If they don’t like to be the focus of attention, however, keep them from feeling uncomfortable.

You should definitely use the golden rule as a baseline no matter what, but keep the platinum rule in mind for when you get a feel for how someone likes to be treated. They will like you a lot more for it.

11 Secrets of Irresistible People [The Good Men Project via Inc]


  • “in any situation” provided you’ve had the time, and have the insight, to know how the people you are with would like to be treated. Typically, if you know how someone would like to be treated you will have known them for long enough and got close enough to find that out, which implies that they like you enough to spend time with you. Bit of a Catch 22 situation.
    The “Golden Rule” might seem rather generic, but it’s a pretty good generalisation.

  • You must not have any children. This only continues to work for a very limited time before they start to just get demanding, rather than being appreciative. I strongly suspect that this applies far more widely than with children. I’m calling BS.

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