Some of us have a hard time saying no to people. Whether it’s a personal favour, work you don’t have time for, or an invitation to an event you don’t feel like attending, we all occasionally agree to things we don’t really want to do. If you struggle with this, stop overcommitting yourself by making sure you always ask for time to think.
Photo by Andrew
For some, this is a no-brainer. But for obligers and people pleasers, it’s our gut reaction to say yes to every request, even when it’s unreasonable or we aren’t sure if we have time for it. If you have a hard time saying no, Tiny Buddha makes this suggestion:
Setting new boundaries with the people you love is never easy, and it takes time. The key is to take a deep breath and step back when you find yourself entering the people-pleasing zone. Saying “I’m not sure yet, can I get back to you?” is a step in the right direction. This gives you time to think the issue through so you don’t feel pressured into making a decision.
It helps to ask that question in every situation in which you aren’t 100% sure you can commit. This puts you in the habit of asking it, no matter what. Next time you feel like saying yes, use it as a trigger to remember to ask for more time. It may be a question that comes naturally for some, but for those who have a hard time saying no, it’s worth remembering.
Saying Yes When We Mean No: Breaking the Habit [Tiny Buddha]