It can be tough identifying the right times to fight for something. You want to stand up for what you think is right, but you also don’t want to exacerbate the confrontation. These simple guidelines can help you decide when it’s worth your time.
Photo by Tambako The Jaguar
When you get into it with someone, things can become pretty heated. There can be lasting effects from a confrontation about something small. Kathleen Kelley Reardon at Big Think put together a great list of times when it's best not to engage in battle:
- There's a low probability of winning without doing excessive damage
- Upon reflection, winning isn't as important as it originally seemed
- There likely will be a time down the line when you can raise the issue again with a different person or in a different way
- The other party's style is provocative whether speaking with you or others, so it's not worth taking personally
- You could win on the immediate issue, but lose big in terms of the relationship
We've talked about fighting for what actually matters before, but it's a good idea to have a quick rundown to help you in the moment. Think about what winning would actually mean in the situation. Chances are it doesn't always matter as much as you think it does.
What Does "Choose Your Battles" Really Mean? [Big Think]