Avoid Being ‘Too Nice’ To Dodge Excessively Needy People

Avoid Being ‘Too Nice’ To Dodge Excessively Needy People

If you are nice to others, people will be nice to you. That’s common sense. But sometimes being overly nice isn’t always the best policy — we can attract the wrong kinds of people by being nice all the time.

Photo by Liza

Quora responders wrestled with the disadvantages of being too nice. Commenter Borang Touch explains that you need to set boundaries. You can't be nice to everyone in every situation:

you will start to attract needy, whiny, overly emotional, demanding/controlling, 'guilt tripping you if you don't do something for them' types of people.

Being too nice really is a thing and some people might see you as a pushover. Hit the link for other ways being nice can hurt you.

What are the disadvantages of being too nice to people [Quora via Inc.com]


  • I reckon the article has exactly the wrong approach.

    If you act overly nice, needy people identify themselves earlier, so you can cut them out of your life faster.

    It’s a filter, like, growing long hair when new-job hunting. If the potential employer was willing to reject you on the basis of your hair, you didn’t want to work for them.

    • I hear what you’re saying – but your example is a bit off. If your job hunting and projecting an image counter to the business – then you will be rejected. The people you were to work with may have been fantastic – but because you didn’t choose to make tweaks – you can just keep on looking longer for a job.

    • I’ve found that if you aren’t overly nice you never have to deal with overly needy people because they’re always kept at the appropriate distance.

      Cutting off toxic people is hardwork and emotionally difficult whether you’ve known them for a short time or a long time. They are like moths to a flame and dig in like leeches very quickly. I call them Meeches! Or possibly Leechoths!

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