In relationships, we sometimes blindside our partners with unfair accusations. We assume the worst, when we should be assuming the best. Next time, look for reasons you may be wrong in your assumptions and you could avoid a fight.
Photo by Renato Guerreiro.
Psychology Today has a list of suggestions to avoid fights with your partner. One of their better recommendations includes looking for “disconfirming information” before attributing a reason for a frustrating behaviour:
We tend to look for facts that confirm our beliefs. If you are frustrated that your partner was supposed to be home 10 minutes ago, the automatic response is to think about all the other times your partner was late, and envision her chatting with friends and ignoring the time. Instead, force yourself to think about any times when your partner was late due to circumstances out of her control and search for reasons that could help explain why your partner wasn’t able to get home when she said she would.
Just asking yourself “What other reasons could there be for this?” pulls the focus away from a negative assumption and you’ll be able to see other possibilities. While the tips refer to partners in romantic relationships, it’s a smart tip that you can use with other members of your family, flatmates and coworkers.
Check out the link for other quick ways to prevent fights.
5 Tips for Sidestepping Conflict in Close Relationships [Psychology Today]