Dear Lifehacker, Last week I found out my best friend is getting married later this year and I have the honour of being the best man. With this honour comes two main responsibilities and it’s the reason I am writing to you. The first task is organising a buck’s night.
Never having gone to a buck’s night (this is the first of my group of friends getting married) my only exposure to one is from the movie The Hangover, something I don’t want to replicate. At the same time I don’t know where to start and would like some tips to making a great night out for my mate. The second task is the speech at the wedding: what makes a good speech? Thanks, Better Best Man
[credit provider=”Charlie Brewer” url=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/charliebrewer/with/270042368/”]
Dear BBM,
There are many ways to make a buck’s night memorable and the best choice will naturally depend on the groom’s personality. If you’re not using the buck’s night as an excuse to embarrass and debase your mate, there’s no reason why he can’t be part of the initial planning process.
Throwing ideas around will ensure he actually gets to do something he wants and allows you to gauge the appropriate level of debauchery (i.e. — is he the type of guy who would prefer a boozy fishing trip or a seedy night in a strip club?) Without getting into too many spoilers, find out what kind of activities he’d like to partake in and plan the buck’s night accordingly.
One popular option is to rent a property (preferably near the coast) and extend the buck’s night over a weekend. You can then hit bars, hire a boat, bum around on the beach and/or hire strippers as the weekend rolls on.
This also gives the event a neat, satisfying finish as opposed to a slow, undignified death — instead of everyone drunkenly slinking off in the wee hours of the morning, you get to enjoy a few hours of recovery and a celebratory breakfast together. The important thing is to keep the schedule loose and fun with plenty of free alcohol for the buck.
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Here are some important no-nos:
- Keep the total cost reasonable: If the price is too hefty, the poorer/tighter members of your posse wont turn up.
- Avoid insane levels of depravity: My own buck’s night was organised by the editor of a leading porn magazine. I still get occasional ‘Nam-style flashbacks and none of them are pretty.
- Keep it legal and safe: See above.
- Don’t get hammered too early: Take it easy to begin with or everyone will be too drunk to function before it even hits midnight. The event will subsequently be remembered as a bit of a fizzer.
- DON’T HOLD IT THE NIGHT BEFORE THE WEDDING: This is an epically stupid move that will put you in the dog house with his missus forever.
[clear] [clear]
When it comes to the speech, the key is to keep it reasonably brief and heartfelt. Concentrate on one or two anecdotes that are funny and/or a testament to his character and throw a few compliments in the bride’s direction too. While you should resist the urge to be unduly insulting, some good-natured ribbing is never a bad thing: it keeps the speech from getting boring and is an easy way to get some laughs.
If you’re not great at public speaking, it’s definitely a good idea to practice in the lead-up to the wedding. One good training method is to keep track of your “Ums” and “Ahs”; this is nervous filler that can kill a speech in its tracks.
It also helps to focus on the reality of your audience — these people aren’t out to judge you (in fact, most of them will be more interested in their slice of wedding cake or the cute guy/gal at the next table). You can find a veritable smorgasbord of additional public speaking tips here.
If any readers have their own buck’s night tips — or just want to share the crazy stuff they got up to — let BBM know in the comments section below.
Cheers
Lifehacker
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Comments
13 responses to “Ask LH: How Can I Organise A Buck’s Night?”
Must have good food.
Sounds like you’re young (first wedding of your friends), so cost is going to be a top priority.
Also factor in events for the older crew, even if it’s just a couple of hours at the start.
Lots of communication – get the list of invitees early and let them know to reserve the date.
My Best Man organised a Pub Crawl with “games” at each pub. He split the invitees into 2 groups and the losers had to buy drinks for the winners. I had separate challenges to complete at each pub. ie getting a snog from the oldest woman in the bar!
The games broke the ice for people who didn’t know each other and kept the night fun, such that people who had originally said they “had to leave early” stayed on for the entire night.
He also “looked after me”, making sure that I didn’t drown in alcohol early in the night.
I still have the little homemade keyring with business cards of each of the pubs that he made for everyone (as do a number of the guys who came along)
Whatever you do, do not use one of those Bucks Party websites. They are a total rip off and are poorly organised. My friends best man used one about a month ago and I would say it’s the worst party I’ve ever been to and $170 for a 3 hour party, I can tell you that I was expecting a lot more.
Make sure everyone has a proper meal before heading out drinking. My own only had finger food… I didn’t see midnight before being thrown in a cab.
Stuff the old Bucks and Hens nights…do a Hucks Night! Combined! Had way more fun than I have had on any Bucks night I had been too
aahhhh NO
Bugger, wrote this as a reply, not a new comment. My bad :B
Who are you? Hucks night? Unless the wedding is a comitment cerremony between two men or two women then a Hucks night (really, Hucks night?) sounds like the worst night of your life or an ecxcuse for a bloke who has no mates. I’ve got to assume that you are trolling and therefore I have fallen for your cunning plan. Well played.
my missus wants to go to a strip club for her hens (not magic mike, but more like Slippery Sarah)
so i found a hucks night might be a good idea.
that being said, Chris. we need a detailed article on these nam-flash backs =)
Especially if you’re a young group that haven’t been to many bucks before, the old paintball or go karting followed by dinner and drinks/strippers is tried and true. No points for originality, but plenty of fun to be had.
My mate’s buck’s night was the best times I’d had in a hell of a long time. One of the best men lived down in Melbourne and was a med student, so he knew all the best drinking spots. He put together a list of pubs that were all within walking distance from each other, and a few other venues inbetween. At some of the places, we had food, and some of the other places were a bit of a walk, so we’d walk or eat off our booze.
By the end of the night, having visited at least 15 pubs, a strip club and a video game bar (Mana bar — not worth the money, trust me), we parted ways and went home drunk, but not too drunk.
As long as everyone knows where you’re going to next, they can sit out a few rounds and still catch up to the group.
Does anyone have any suggestions of activities or venues for Perth?
If you’re the best man, you should know the Groom well enough to know what he enjoys doing. So tailoring activities to that is ideal. Of the few that I’ve been involved in:
We did a BBQ at someones house with some racing simulators and had a lap times comp as well as other activities, then booked a mini bus to the city for ‘further entertainment’.
For another one, we played soccer in a park in the arvo, back to a house for dinner and drinks with ‘entertainment’, then mini bus to the city for more ‘entertainment’
and similar to the one above, Played cricket at a park in the arvo, back to a house for dinner and ‘entertainment’, also had a poker evening organised, then again a mini bus to the city for ‘further entertainment’
Above all, make sure the buck has a night he’ll never forget!
Just make sure you plan way ahead, it doesn’t matter if some people can afford to chip in more than others. It’s important ALL the bucks friends are there! (who can make it)
You are bound to go over-budget no matter what so if you plan ahead and save up a couple of grand for an Entourage style bucks party it will be totally worth it! One weekend, just rent an awesome luxury 5 room apartment somewhere for one night with your friends, get everyone to bring the hard stuff for the night, but also make sure you buy enough beer for everyone yourself. Organize getting in on guest lists at clubs and find a good strip club rather than hiring a stripper (bad hiring experiences) that night.
Then the next morning, if weather permits, extend the party by going Go Karting and a round of Golf whilst hung-over. Trust me it’s hilarious!