Ah, nice, so to leave a good first impression you should leave a good first impression.

inboulder1

This might sound like common sense, but if you are sitting down waiting for someone to come in to the room, stand up when they do come in and then shake their hand. A person I interviewed recently just sat there and offered up his hand - immediate turn off. Needless to say, we aren't hiring them.

forrman

Good advice. The site content is pretty good too.

Did anyone try signing up for the site's RSS? It doesn't seem to be working for my Firefox's live bookmarks.

AliZ

Use proper grammar and vocab[ulary] that reflects a higher education.

But don't overdo the last part - while your degree program may have exposed you to numerous people who know the meaning of "melancholy" and "obsequious", it's better to use "sad" and "enthusiastic go-getter" and hope for the best.

Jim (The Canuck One)

@forrman:

Your not hiring someone just because they didn't stand up?

I hate all this corporate bull. If a company doesn't want someone for who they are then they shouldn't want the company.

Myles

I'm always impressed by people who are good active listeners. Because it makes an impression on me, I try to provide the same courtesy for others too. Whether you care or not about what they have to say, listening and engaging them as though you do can go a long way.

cheesebubble

@forrman:

I agree with Myles that it seems absurd to not hire someone because he didn't stand up. Many rules of etiquette seem very awkward to me because they really aren't mere common sense. Not sticking your hand in a fire is common sense. Making someone stand up when it's not really necessary is a display of power.

Even more awkward is how I as a woman fit into this system. Do I need to stand up? How feminine should I be? Will someone not have a good impression of me because of something they consider "common sense"? There seems to be a lot of grey area here.

MarieHuynh

"Making someone stand up when it's not really necessary is a display of power."

Oh, but it IS necessary; to show respect for the person you're interviewing with - or any stranger. If someone did NOT stand up and STILL tried to shake my hand, I'd probably try not to laugh at their ignorance of social skills and they would certainly get a 'strike against them'.

I think it's awfully arrogant to be so anti-establishment that you would think you don't need to assume common social respects in ANY professional situation. Actually, you don't have to - but good luck getting any further work from said hypothetical person - or any of their contacts. -.-

cJw

I'm with cJw on this one. I'm quite the wild anarchist at home, but when I'm trying to make a first impression? You stand up. You look people in the eye, but not psycho-style. You shake firmly, no limp noodle. You don't over-do the vocabulary, as Jim pointed out. These are all just common sense for most folks in business, but I have interviewed HUGE numbers of people in IT and find that the social skills are often weak at best.

Shack

Don't forget that people with different backgrounds may have different social pleasantries. For example, it can be considered threatening to look someone directly in the eye. Or, a handshake could be replaced with a sincere head nod or a bow. I'm sure there are tons of others.

It's easy to be offended when someone doesn't do what you would expect of them as a show of respect but rather than write them off immediately, I would recommend digging deeper and finding other clues to either confirm or refute your suspicions. You might be surprised.

Also keep in mind you are hiring someone to get a job done. Flippant judgements of character can result in turning away real talent.

jcobol

Yes, women should stand up when the interviewer enters the room (what if it's a woman-- you'd look pretty silly). Rising to your feet and shaking the hand of the person entering the room signal that you are energetic and ready to work. The handshake, I've read, symbolically is to show that your right hand is empty of weapons-- not to rise and shake might make the other person wonder what you are hiding and why you are not interested enough in the job to show yourself to your best advantage.

It is not a "flippant judgment"- the hiring person must make a split decision on whether he or she wants to spend a great deal of time with this person. It is not simply "to get a job done"-- the person doing the hiring is responsible for finding someone who will fit into the existing group.I'm in the process of firing someone else's hire. She treats our clients rudely and refuses to comply with procedures set up to ensure accurate book-keepinq despite repeated requests and a formal warning. We are pulling her like a dead weight through water. She just doesn't think the rules should apply to her. Her replacement must be willing to shake hands with the rest of us.

Emsaidso

@Jim (The Canuck One)

I know posts are not meant to be pedantic (so sorry in advance).
However while I can see how you can use sad instead of melancholy (though I think the two words have different emphasis) - how do you go from "obsequious" (i.e. servile, submissive) to "enthusiastic go-getter"?

rmagere

...and after a while, you can work on points for style
Like the club tie, and the firm handshake
A certain look in the eye, and an easy smile

You have to be trusted by the people that you lie to
So that when they turn their backs on you
You'll get the chance to put the knife in...

-Pink Floyd

strider_mt2k

I believe that it is essential to either Stand up, or make the gesture to. Making the Gesture becomes necessary if you are unable to stand for any reason ... whether simply inconvenience or whatever, but you just do NOT sit back comfortable in your chair and stick your hand out.

'Sitting back' in a chair at those times sends multiple messages, and they are all negative.

DasLife

@jcobol, very good point on the different cultures. Most of my point above are US-centric, most definitely.

Another point, at least for me, I don't go to work to express my personality. I go to accelerate my career, and thus my income. In order to either of those, I have to get the job first. I wouldn't take a job at a "stuffy" place to begin with, I could never work in a place where I had to wear a tie every day, for example. But the reality is that you have to "fit in" to "get in", most of the time, in my experience.

Shack

While I think you'd be an idiot not to stand up and shake a hand, I think you'd be an equal idiot for writing someone off straightaway based on the observance of a single societal quirk. How do we know the crappy coworker in Emsaidso's post didn't stand up to shake the interviewer's hand?

There's plenty of crappy workers who can play the game in an interview. Unless you're just trying to thin the herd of applicants, an interviewer needs to use a little more critical thinking.

Troy F.

I agree with the other posters who have indicated that it's polite / proper protocol to stand when someone enters the room to interview you. To me, it's a show of respect to the other person - regardless of your gender or theirs.

Personally, whenever I am being interviewed, or having any sort of formal discussion with someone new (or at a higher rank / position of power), I don't sit down before they do, or before they invite me to sit. As above, I do this as a measure of respect. (Informal discussions - I just sit down.)

fritzk3

HR is mostly staffed by robotic idiots.

spaceman7

@jim:

If I were interviewing with someone who thought "melancholy" and "obsequious" were unusual words, I'd have to find somewhere else to work..

My worst "introduction" was at a small community newspaper where I was brought in to meet the V.P. of Sales. I had a cup of coffee in my hand as I approached his desk; he stood up and put out his hand, I unconsciously extended mine and spilled my coffee all over his desk.

He was a good sport - I got the job (consulting work) and had a great relationship with him for many years after.

pcunix

Good article, lots of much-needed reminders there!

Forrman - you are absolutely right. When I was a lot less confident (and a lot more aloof!), I'd get passed over after interviews a lot of times. When I reviewed my interviewing style with a few friends, they pointed out a slew of things about me that I was doing wrong. The very first thing they mentioned was to stand up and shake hands, don't wait for them to come to you. I think that alone goes a long way in making a positive first impression.

People decide if they like you within seconds. If you don't own those first few seconds, then you'll be starting from the bottom of a hole and trying to dig your way out.

FiberBoy

As a young man whenever I have met a person for an interview or to talk to about work or such I believe a good posture, a firm strong handshake for men/or a firm but non-threatening handshake for women, and a warm friendly smile (remember your eyes are key when smiling! A lifeless look in your eyes when smiling is a huge turn off but warm friendly eyes are golden) will always allow you to give a great first impression. Standing up when someone walks in who is in all accounts an authoritative figure (the person conducting the interview) helps show them you are mindful of rank and placement which is important in a company job.

When leaving the interview remember to shake hands once more, give a warm smile, and then (obviously!) thank them. These help leave a picture in the interviewers mind that will make you stick out as a potential employee. :)

Silver_Back